Wednesday, April 29, 2009


Man I love this kid!
Tonight after coming home from a evening of learning to cook Indian food, I stopped by Oscar's room and he was up tinkering with some things. I said hello and said "Hey kiddo thanks for being such a great kid. I sure love you."
To this he responded: "Why did you say that?"
Me- "I dunno because I do?"
O-"Oh, I was just wondering because you usually only say that when you were mad at me."

Me-(Insert all sorts of guilt laden feelings...I'm sure i say it more frequently than that...Don't I????)
"Well, you know I love you all of the time, right?"

O- "Yeah mom"

Me- "I do love you, have a good night, and turn your light off soon."

O-"night mom"

Am I seriously this mom who only tells him I love him after I have been mad at him??? I suppose that isn't the worst thing. I mean, at least after I have been angry with him, I tell him that I still love him. That should mean something Right?

Note to self: shower that boy with hugs and kisses until he can't stand it!!!! No more of giving him his first grader space...He MUST know that I have adored him since he was born! He must know how much I love him! Sometimes I love my kids so much it just hurts!!!
I hope that he knows that I adore the way he takes on this world full of curiosity and kindness, with a soft heart and an eager mind. He should know that I miss him when he is at school and I long for the days when we used to go hiking for hours, just him and me.
Is all of that forgotten? Am I becoming too distracted for him to realize just how much I can't imagine this world without him being a part of it????
Well, at least one day when he is grown and he looks back and remembers his childhood, maybe then he will read this and know that yes, I do love him and that the majority of my days are spent trying to create a place of Love, joy and safety for him. without sheltering him too much.
I'm sure this is just the beginning...but he can expect a lot more hugs in the near future!


Suzie-Q said...

They always remember the bad things i think. My kids are always telling me about when I was mad at them for something, I usually don't remember but they always do!

Jen said...

kids have the shortest little memory systems. i have to remember to do these things, too- it seems like once a day is becoming forgotten....

oh man, my heart is ripping out and i'm going to run to give the k-man a hug. i'm already having nightmares about full day kindergarten for him and the baby in childcare.... this fall will be rough...

Danielle said...

That saying, "kids say the darndest things" is so true! Once while trying to get the kids to help me clean up, Garrick asked, "Who's coming over?" Well no one, but apparently his view on things is that I only cleaned when someone was coming over!

Maren and Blake said...

Cute story. I am sure he knows you love him. I think we all get in that routine sometimes. Keep up the overwhelming kiss & hug patrol.

mummy said...

I hope he will remember all the good times. Unfortunately my kids only remember every stinking bad thing I did to them or with them. I often wonder if there were any good times for them. However, I can't do a redo so I hope somewhere deep within their souls are some feelings of warmth from their childhood.

mamma locks said...

That is so awesome, it;s amazing what they notice about us parents huh? Yesterday I asked Felicity to clean her room and she responded "not right now mom" and then of course I said "yes right now". And without even a breath she responded " well you can't always get what you want!" Holy Cow!!! where on earth did she get that??? Awesome huh? Hey hows baby doin anyway. we should catch up I can't believe she's already a couple months old.